... and again I was stuck

I can’t decide if I’m lucky or very unlucky to have my second life in America. The joy I feel every time I fly into San Diego airport is indescribable. Knowing that I will spend time with people I love, in a place that is just pure happiness for me is just the biggest feeling of peace and comfort for me. I am fortunate to have friends there who I will love and cherish for the rest of my life and no matter how far apart we are we still keep in touch and need each other. My memories and the stories I have from there are some of the happiest of my life!

But every time I have to leave my heart breaks in to a million pieces! The longing and need I feel for that perfect place after I get back to Sweden is so strong and it just kills me. And it’s so hard because I absolutely LOVE my city, Stockholm, but there is a certain darkness and coldness about this place that I love getting a break from. People just aren’t as happy, nice or caring.

I just miss my friends and miss having a genuinely happy life… There is just a little too much that’s happening here right not that I have no control over and that I’m not choosing… It’s going to be a long winter.